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What's Your Secret to Handling Grief and Anger?

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Sometimes life is so out of our control we have to step back and view it from another angle.

 For those who didn't know, my sister passed away a month ago, today. I tell myself it's okay, it's for the best. She's happier and healthier and yet I am still pissed. I feel as if I am on a short fuse and I wonder if that is how the other members of my family feel. People are snapping. Saying little things they've never said. Using words they've never used. Showing faces I have never seen them make. We're all just a little different.

Sunday we celebrated birthdays. My grandson made 2 earlier in the month while my daughter and my sister's daughter celebrated their shared birthdays on the 21st of this month. This was our first major get together since her passing. Of course we had fun, good conversation and laughter. But the grief could be seen in everyone's eyes. We, at least I, never mentioned Angela once. I wonder if that was a good thing.
 I just know when I watched my daughter working on the cake she made for her son, I wanted to kick something. I know my sister would have been so tickled at the hand made deco. I know she would have loved watching Pinoch showing off all he has recently learned, playing with her grandchild, watching our so grown children and I wanted to kick something. 

I don't know what really helps during this time, but my brother-in-law recommends the book 90 Minutes in Heaven. He believes Don Piper, who says he died and went to Heaven, shares his insights and his anger on having to return to life. Just looking at my sister's husband and the smile he carries on his face I have to believe him when he says 'Once you read this book you will be so comforted it will put everything into perspective.' I may have to read it.

What is your take on grief/anger and  how have you handled it?

2 Response to What's Your Secret to Handling Grief and Anger?

March 1, 2013 at 3:40 PM

I have no secret. I tend to bottle it up until I am alone and then let it out. Kicking things helps. Crying. Writing. Wine. But in front of others, I keep my crap together. Don't know if that is a secret, or even a good idea. So very sorry about your sister. I'm close to mine also and she is now stage IV metastatic. I don't want to lose her, but I think about the possibility often.

March 12, 2013 at 10:50 AM

I'm just seeing this. Though my sister was ill for years and I dreded that phone call, what she dide from was a surprise to us. I miss hera lot, hold in a lot, but sonetimes have to let it out. I'll keep your sister in prayer .


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